Contented.

Smiling has kind of been the norm right now.

I've hit a plateau in my life where it seems hard not to praise God every single second, though I often fail to do so. How could I curse God, how could I ignore His obvious sovereignty and providence and good will in my life? How could I ever do this, in rich or in poor.

The God of the Universe has given me many things, the cross & empty tomb & the hope of glory with Him the three ultimate gifts, granting me the propensity for worship.

What has happened so far...(the American Edition)

It has been a hot minute since I have given an update on where we are at in life, so I figured there is some news to catch up on, some opportunities to unravel, and some events to explain.

Firstly, I have been planning and preparing and looking forward to my new leadership position next year as President of Thespians - the theater club on my campus. Ultimately, this opportunity will give me experience in both leading a club as well as helping others understand and involve themselves in various aspects of theater and dramaturgy. Alongside that, I have been granted the opportunity to direct the Musical in the Fall, and I could not be more thrilled. So far, it has been a matter of planning and securing rights, something I am so excited for!

It has been a wonderful year to be Thespians Vice-President and Class of 2024 President, and though sad to switch over teams and to say goodbye to working alongside many of them, I am excited to see what the Lord has in store for me and my new Thespian team. I am also kind of ready to not be leading two different clubs - that was a lot!

The year has also given me many experiences I know I could label "once-in-a-lifetime". Between many choir performances (and the choir tour), the MuKappa and Choir retreat, performing at Acousta, celebrating my 20th birthday, the Student Government Gala, the Improv team, The Little Prince Play, Christmas in Pennsylvania, my first time trick-or-treating, fall break with my best friends, or spring break with my second family, I have been creating lasting memories along the way that I can only thank God for.

Oh, and my parents for letting me move 11,000 miles away!

But the unexpected came towards the end of the semester, and that was a new relationship with a pretty cool guy! There is not much to share, or maybe there is too much to share - and not worth publishing on a blog. What I can say is this, never try and guess what God will do. When you predict, it has often been my experience that he brings the unexpected.

I guess the same could be said for coming home - or one of my homes: Australia.

What has happened so far...(the Australian Edition)

Coming back to Australia was perhaps one of the most unexpected things about the past couple of years since COVID became our world's norm. I could not believe that WA opened up in March. After many months of sobbing into my pillow, of talking of home, of praying, of looking through old pictures, the Lord was kind in bringing me back to this place I was also calling home.

A place I had been scared to call home while here, for fear I was losing an aspect of my identity: being an American.

In truth, we have discussed my identity crisis all too much, so I feel perhaps the best thing I can do is give an update on all that God has allowed me to do.

In the weeks and months leading up to this trip, after that wonderful day I booked the flights to come home and celebrated with friends and family all over the globe, there were numerous times of stress. The ultimate was the two weeks prior to coming home. Finals week was coming, I still had to pack up my room before summer break came upon us and I had to pack to leave the country for three months. As well as that, there was saying goodbye to friends I had made, and were moving on after graduation. It was stressful.

And Western Australia was going to give me a run for my money with all of its entry requirements.

But God was faithful. Somehow, exam season was not so rough, and I found many times to relax and hang out with friends, and to pack up my room and make sure things were ready before I left the country. God was so kind to me. In fact, God has been so kind to me.

God answered my prayer in finding me a ride to Washington DC so I could fly out. God answered my prayer that check in and security and documentation would all be easy and a breeze. The flights were not so long, especially sleeping through them. Doha Airport was large enough not to be bored for my 9 hours layover. God provided every step of the way.

And then, that Tuesday Night, 3rd May, I arrive home to my family. I met my niece for the first time, at five months old. I hugged my parents and brother and sister-in-law whom I had not seen since July 2020. Soli Deo Gloria.

Since that night, I have been given so many lovely catch ups with friends, family, best friends and their family. Lifelong mentors have encouraged me, affirmed me, have built me up in the Lord. I have been able to work, and to relax, to grow and be molded.

And it's only been a couple of weeks. But God can take however long He wants to. I am His vessel. I am broken and hurting and raw, but I am His clay. He has made me His and this is His life. Praise God for the months He is giving me to be where I am and to continue to be sanctified.

Concluding thoughts...

It's hard not to feel content right now.

Honestly, God has worked so many things out according to his weird and wonderful plan. God has blessed me abundantly throughout these many years, and perhaps coming home has been the cherry on top. Sometimes I fear it is actually the tip of the iceberg, something dreadful looming underneath.

I know God isn't out to get me, I know he graciously gives his children blessings, and sometimes it comes in crazy ways. But after talking with a couple of people, I sometimes just wonder "surely, God is going to take something away from me soon?"

But it would seem a shame to live in fear rather than gratefulness. Sometimes, I just think sanctification means suffering, but perhaps God enjoys blessing us, given that we extol Him and His name. But, as my Mom has said to me before "We never know what God is doing", well unless it has been revealed in scripture. Yet, my understanding remains limited. But I know a thing or two about blessing from scripture.

In the context of persecution, James writes

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." (James 1:17)

God gives good gifts (perhaps hard, but always good) in order to help us with the spiritual battle that we are to wage. And every single one of these gifts is what James calls "perfect"

I cannot say exactly what my opportunities, and every conversation, and every meal, and every physical commodity means in light of the Spiritual battle I still must fight every day. I cannot say whether they are preparing me for suffering later on. Perhaps this post immediately precedes the hardest of events I will ever have to face.

But for the life I have had so far, I cannot complain. It is hard not to feel content. May I continue to only ever feel content in the Lord.