Others vs. Self

Personal spiritual growth. Aah...such a beautiful phrase...to the people who grew up in the 20th or 21st century. What my Mom recently pointed out to me (and others in her adult Church History class) is that many people in the Middle Ages and prior to that would not have full and complete access to God's word. Some would not have been able to read it. And, unfortunately, devotionals were just not a thing.

So why such a big thing now?

Well, before you get the impression that reading God's word, praying, listening to worship music are bad things, I want you to know that if it wasn't for these things I would be utterly distracted. I wouldn't be able to focus on God, especially in the business and craziness of this world.

So why the talk?

Others. Shivers. Literal Shivers. This is the part where you say that building up the body is more important than building up self. Internal voice would be correct. And do you know why I have come to this conclusion. I suppose you could say 1 Corinthians 13 and 14 kinda changed my mind. But first, some necessary understanding

Setting the scene for love

Love. A four-letter, loaded word. Means so much in our generation. Has a vast number of definitions that cannot be contained in a single dictionary. I think 1 Corinthians 13 has a great definition and y'all know it:

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.

Or how about the greatest definition out there from 1 John 4:8:

God is love.

And love is one of the central ideas in the Bible. John 3:16 says "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life". Love wrapped the greatest gift we could ever receive. Perhaps the greatest gift of God's love was demonstrated in the death of Jesus Christ on that cross. Love came in perfection - fully man, fully God.

And as every Christian living article demonstrates, the greatest commandment is to love God whilst the second greatest is to love your neighbour as yourself. A command which, on its own, is incredibly difficult to carry our perfectly.

And yet as 1 Corinthians 13 says in verse 8 - "Love never ends." Love hold eternal significance. And I feel it is important that I establish this idea before I talk about Others vs.Self, because once love comes into the picture, it is no longer a battle. In fact, "self" never appears. It becomes others-centred. We put God first, then others. That is the equation. No "me" in "God" or "Others", as they might say.

Spiritual gifts

The love verse is such a popular section in the Bible. But it is super confronting. Just read through it. But for the Corinthians, it was confronting them in a way we don't often think. When we read in light of the other verses and chapters surrounding, I understand it so much better.

Chapter 14 puts a huge emphasis on spiritual gifts. It goes into why prophecy (by which I think he also means preaching + teaching) is better than tongues, and you can read for yourself some of these reasons. But one of the key reasons he says is in verse 4 (and more thoroughly explained throughout the chapter) is because "The one who speaks in a tongue builds up himself, but the one who prophesies builds up the church".

Now, I think we could read this verse out of context and think, "hmmm...but building up yourself isn't bad, is it?". To a certain extent I would agree with you. I already said above, this personal growth has a huge place in our lives. But the spirit is working in our lives, whether he manifests himself in speaking in tongues.

Frankly, without proper interpretation, speaking in tongues does little in helping others. And don't forget the main goal of speaking in tongues was to get the gospel out to nations that had not heard it in their own language. In some ways, its the same with visions and prophecies. It should mainly manifest itself in countries where the gospel is absent. And why do we feel we need more, when God's word has given us plenty to soak in?

But this is not a lecture on spiritual gifts, it is clarification on Paul's main point, or question rather: what builds up the body? And I think this is where the love part comes into it.

Check out verse 1 of Chapter 14

Pursue love, and earnestly desire the spiritual gifts, especially that you may prophesy.

Perhaps you glance at this and think, "they are put on equal levels: love and spiritual gifts" and I might have agreed with you until I noticed something that could be a game changer. Notice how our pursuit of love is an active process, whereas the desire of spiritual gifts is much more passive. More correctly, you might say that the pursuit of love is something we do, whilst spiritual gifts come from the spirit and cannot be controlled by us.

And you may even notice that prophecy - what Paul believes will build up the body - is the spiritual gift we should yearn for and he uses the same phrase "earnestly desire" in verse 39 when he says "earnestly desire to prophesy". Notably, speaking in tongues - what Paul believes will not build up the body - is not on the same level, though certainly permissible in proper order.

In diagrammatic form, I think it becomes most clear - maybe more useful to those with a math brain:

Love > Prophecy > Speaking in tongues

And, if I haven't already made it clear, their level of importance seems to be determined on what will build up the body. If you didn't already know, Paul spent Chapter twelve saying that no member of the body or role they played in the body was more important, concluding in verse 31b "And I will show you a still more excellent way" to which he means love.

My own experience*

I was at a church on their "Presence Night". And the pastor invited the entire congregation to speak in tongues, and if they had enough faith, they would speak a heavenly language. To me, the tongues spoke very little into my own life. To Paul, the chaos of this event would have been outrageous (14:26-40)

I was not encouraged. I did not feel built up. I know after that night I just felt uncomfortable. And it was not that I felt a lack of the Holy Spirit, or that I felt embarrassed. It was because I knew something was off pudding. And I read verse 23 of chapter 14 which says "If, therefore, the whole church comes together and all speak in tongues, and outsiders or unbelievers enter, will they not say that you are out of your minds?". I know, to any of my non-Christian friends, they would have thought I was crazy.

Worst of all, I felt that they appealed to a lack of faith. They called out, "If you believe...speak in tongues", "Worship God with other languages". And whilst I may have felt secure in the foundations that the spirit had worked for me, for many of my Charismatic and Pentecostal friends not speaking in tongues, it was depressing. They felt they were lacking in their spiritual lives.

And it put an unnecessary focus on my faith and its supposed outcome of spiritual gifts rather than the spirit who transforms us, giving us faith, and sanctifying us all the time.

And it put an unnecessary focus on the believer rather than the body.

And that is why I stepped out discouraged rather than encouraged.

The Others vs. self battle

Can we assume Paul wants us to love ourselves? You can, but I think you would be wrong.

Loving others. Paul wants them to build up each other. If is it not loving, it is not useful. If it does not build up, it is useless. If speaking in tongues and prophecy only glorifies self and your own "spirituality" rather than building up your neighbour or glorifying God, it isn't worth it.

And the focus on loving each other rather than ourselves can culminate in other areas of church life. Because if the music isn't your style but it helps another believer to worship better, then that is beneficial. If the sermon preached that Sunday wasn't suited to you, it may have really helped another person, and that is beneficial. You may not have wanted to serve in Sunday School, or creche, or welcoming, or kitchen, but it meant that another believer could hear the truths of God's word and be built up.

There are too many Christians church-hunting for the "right church for them". What does that mean? Church isn't about you. It is about others, and it is most certainly about praising God with other people.

So whether the issue is spiritual gifts or whatever part of church life, can we just think to ourselves, how might this situation best benefit the body?

In Conclusion

Putting self first is easily the first thing we do. But that if we changed that. What if we though, hmm...I'm not the most important person in the body of Christ. In fact, everyone in the eyes of God is a sinner, is equal in their redemption by Christ (if a Christian), and have been blessed by God will roles that may not be our own but are still valuable (1 Corinthians 12)

Even further than that what if we decided to see our own roles, and what we were gifted with, as something that may or may not build someone else up. Cultivate the spiritual gifts God has given you, but ask yourself this, am I building up the body or only being beneficial to self? You might see many areas in your life have to change.

But in the meantime, God bless, as you are guided by the spirit in how best to serve others. And may the church be built up in your attempts.

*I come from a reformed Presbyterian background. Understand this, that every Charismatic, Pentecostal, baptist or any other denomination is loved by me. But there is a divide because of our beliefs, our theology. God has given us minds and hearts which the Holy Spirit changes in order that we might become more like Christ. As we are infused with God's word, we are shaped. And as such, I feel we reach different conclusions, hopefully in line with God's word.

Whilst you may disagree with my beliefs, I hope you might understand my position. If you would like to chat more, feel free to let me know by commenting underneath. I, like any other person, have beliefs and opinions which I would rather state directly rather than beating-around-the-bush. So I will not apologise for that/them, but if I have stated such in what appears to be hostile, understand this was not my intention.