Dolce Far Niente.

Introduction

The quickest way to escape our own crazy lives is to escape into the lives of others.

Last semester was unreal. Some of us called it cursed. Some of us called it stressful. But all of us agreed that it was crazy. I think I needed an exit ticket.

I have to say, there was something beautiful about directing a musical, leading a Bible study group, heading up the theater club, or leading a community group. It was a pleasure and honor to serve the Lord in these areas. But readers and friends know, busyness is a constant struggle for me. It is something I love and I hate: the latter for the stress it sometimes brings, the former for the connection I feel with people. But I think I maybe learned something more important over my winter break:

1) Connection with people is more than what you are doing.

I often marvel at my calendar for the next week as I look over it. Meetings, study, meals, early mornings, late nights. It all fills up so quickly with stuff to do. But I went away this break to Italy, a country proud of this saying

"Dolce Far Niente"

Simply defined,

The pleasantness of doing nothing.

Anyone who is as keen on the Dick Van Dyke show as I will know this. And to the believer, it sounds like laziness. I suppose it could be. But there is also something wonderful about the Italian way of doing life, something I believe to be very attractive to a busy person: they love to be with people.

I suppose all of us would say that we love people. But do we actually love people, or do we love what we do with people? Do we love what we can get out of our time with people? Do we care about the person, or about what the person can do for us? When we are called to love people, it is a matter of loving them no matter what they do. In fact, they may not do anything at all - we are called to love them. They may do harm to us - we are called to love them. As with any symbiotic relationship we might have with another human being - where what we do works together well - we are called to love the people who may do nothing that helps us out.

Perhaps the interconnectivity and the relationships that I saw in the European culture were far more pleasant for this reason.

The pleasantness of loving people in doing nothing.

Western culture has been driven by the independence of living, the drive to be someone, to define yourself, and to show the world who you are. Western Christianity has made it about being the person God has made you to be. Eastern Christianity has made it about the people God has made us to be. So...

2) Connection with people is more than what you are doing.

It's not really about you. If a connection to people is so important, it's not really about what you are doing, and it's not really about you at all. It's about them. It's about loving them,

But, if we were to get Christianity right, we should come to this understanding. The reason it is far better to learn to do nothing is rest, the reason it is good to connect is love, and the ultimate reason both are important is God. Even in a culture that often rejects God, I found there to be much more of a place for rest and for love than my Western Christianity allows. There were times for dining with others, walking into each other's homes, for greeting people because they had dignity and the right to speak and exist and breathe.

I wish that everyone in my part of the world felt the right to speak and exist and breathe. I want the connection that comes in rest and love, in wine and cheese, in laughter and tears, in speaking and listening. I connected much of my semester over social media and text - but it was disconnecting from all of that that made me connect all the more. Ultimately, I realized how self-focused being technologically connected had made me.

Over the semester, I couldn't rest, or love, or connect well. Neither with the people around me or the God that I serve.

Rest. Love. Connect.

I honestly thought that when I opened up my laptop I was going to share pictures and memories and stories from my trip - and there are many to share. But I started typing and I realized that nothing is on my heart. I mean "Nothing" is on my heart. It's pausing and taking a moment in our crazy lives to appreciate what "Nothing" does. He sits and stares at all the people walking by. He wonders if anyone will pay him any mind.

And he says that, in some ways, he is the key to loving other people around us well. He is the reason we are actually able to connect more.

I would honestly encourage everyone take a month to literally disconnect to reconnect more. To do nothing so that you find everything around you means something. Alan Watts was a man I can hardly endorse as a Christian, but who spoke these words of wisdom I believe can be founded in Christian ideals:

"Stop measuring days by degree of productivity and start experiencing them by degree of presence" - Alan Watts

There is something to be said by taking the time to appreciate what God has placed around us, the people He has put into our lives. There is time in my day to go to the student center, for no reason at all, and talk and connect with the people around me. There is time in my day to go for a hike in the woods and enjoy God's creation because He has made me in it and to take care of it. There is time to rest in the Lord, because He has designed me for resting in Him.

This morning, I read in His word this famous passage from Matthew:

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matt 11:28-30)

There is a God crying out for us to rest and to love and to connect. And while I learned so much about connecting with people over break, I know I have even more to learn about connecting with God. I am eager to learn and ready - in some ways - for nothing.

"Nothing" being what is absolutely necessary for pursuing the calling God has for me - loving others and loving Him even more.

Please Father, help me.